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| Visual metaphor for feeling crushed... |
Everyone has days, I believe, where anxiety is
niggling underfoot and close to causing a fall. Perhaps it is because it is not
appreciated that the anxiety returns? Maybe it is the sense of all the
hostility that lingers in the world, the fragility of all you have? It is the
flipside then, of appreciation: the unpleasant side of not taking life for
granted.
It does not seem fair, that fatheads can live
untrammelled.
Fingers tap on desk: thought occurs. To have
confidence in a thing, is that to take it for granted?
I have been without lots of things; the washing
machine is a good example. I have one now. It works, and I am grateful every
time, for every turn of that drum. I love what I have, have no need of
dissatisfaction.
Except, I don't love that anxiety. Fingers tap on
desk.
When the dice are always rolling, the thrill wavers.
The lack of security frustrates. I would have a haven, a place for buds to grow
un-nipped, for roots to stretch. If I could. Years enough of worry have passed,
they secure my attitude. I would not be spoilt if that simple place was mine.
Fingers tap on desk.
Always I am trying to push back the comfort zones, to
challenge myself, to be strong, to embrace this life. To love the bubble and
not fear the pop.
The things I have, I like them to be useful.
If I have these anxious moments, firstly, they are not
in the comfort zone. By my own argument, this is healthy. Without that jab of
discomfort would I be so pushed to find contentment?
Heavy rain again today: makes a person thoughtful.
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| Kicking out of the comfort zone! |
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